Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by Ariel Mazzarel » Wed, 17 Nov 1993 23:37:49


10.  The world cup would suffer if the greatest team did not show up.

9.   No offense,  but we *are* playing Australia.

8.   Our uniforms look great,  theirs are uglier than a ten dollar ***.

7.   Menem will not be anywhere near the team,  the coach,  or the stadium.

6.   FIFA owes us one.

5.   I already bought tix for Orlando.

4.   The Aussies have gorged themselves on the fantastic Argentinian food,
     specially steaks & pizza & empanadas & alfajores & excuse me while I
     hit the fridge.

3.   The Aussies will show up to play on Thursday instead of Wednesday,  
     confused by the international date line thang.

2.   Fresh from their match against the Springboks,  the Pumas will play
     on defense.

And...

1.   God has come back to our team.

Ariel

 
 
 

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by nagl.. » Thu, 18 Nov 1993 01:26:53

Quote:

>10.  The world cup would suffer if the greatest team did not show up.

Who are you kidding? Argentina screwed the whole show up last time out.

Quote:
>9.   No offense,  but we *are* playing Australia.

And what a great team Argentina have, 1-1 the scoreline was in Sydney.

Quote:
>8.   Our uniforms look great,  theirs are uglier than a ten dollar ***.

Sorry but you don't qualify on the quality of your threads.

Quote:
>7.   Menem will not be anywhere near the team,  the coach,  or the stadium.

Who or what the hell is 'Menem'?

Quote:
>6.   FIFA owes us one.

You aren't by any chance a member of the Maradona camp that believes FIFA to be
a world wide mafiosi?

Quote:
>5.   I already bought tix for Orlando.

And God said let there be dweebs who jump the gun and get stuck with tickets
they won't need.

Quote:
>4.   The Aussies have gorged themselves on the fantastic Argentinian food,
>     specially steaks & pizza & empanadas & alfajores & excuse me while I
>     hit the fridge.

Highly unlikely, they've been having barbies.

Quote:
>3.   The Aussies will show up to play on Thursday instead of Wednesday,  
>     confused by the international date line thang.

Ya right and by sailing west Columbus fell off the edge of the world.

Quote:
>2.   Fresh from their match against the Springboks,  the Pumas will play
>     on defense.

Just as they did in Italia'90 and for the South American Championships
struggling as the mediocre team they are.

Quote:
>And...
>1.   God has come back to our team.

I never knew he played for Argentina - I thought he scored for Israel against  
France (Hmmm - maybe FIFA is a mafiosi)

Quote:
>Ariel

Have you given any thought to the fact that if Argentina qualify they may play
in the finals without Cannigia and Maradona due to their drug offences - what a
mediocre team they'd be then.

 
 
 

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by Stig Opped » Thu, 18 Nov 1993 04:19:25

Quote:
Ariel Mazzarelli writes:

 > 10.  The world cup would suffer if the greatest team did not show up.
Excactly, which is why I am still hoping for a miracle in Poznan/Bologna.

 > 9.   No offense,  but we *are* playing Australia.
No offence (not much!), but they *are* playing Argentina.

 > 8.   Our uniforms look great,  theirs are uglier than a ten dollar ***.
Are you kidding? The Aussies green and yellow kits beat the Argies prison
uniforms anyday.

 > 7.   Menem will not be anywhere near the team,  the coach,  or the stadium.
You wish....  

 > 6.   FIFA owes us one.
 FIFA owes it to the rest of the world to prevent the most overrated team to get
to the states. Oh, no, I've just played into the hands of the FIFA-is-the-Mafia
crowd!!

 > 5.   I already bought tix for Orlando.
 ORLANDO???? Why not San Francisco??

 > 4.   The Aussies have gorged themselves on the fantastic Argentinian food,
 >      specially steaks & pizza & empanadas & alfajores & excuse me while I
 >      hit the fridge.
Which reminds me - I haven't eaten since breakfast, the stores are all closed,
and all I have is corn flakes and milk. <<Groan!>>

 > 1.   God has come back to our team.
 >
 > Ariel

You actually mean this, don't you?

Here is the Top 1 reason why Australia *will* qualify:

1. I have predicted Argentina to win 4-2.

Here's my recent record of predictions/analysis:

1. "Even though I am against the phrase 'World's Best Team', an exception can be
made for the current Manchester United side". Cue Galatasaray.

2. "Norway have a good chance of making the quarter-finals of the World Cup."
Days later, they pull off the worst performance in the history of international
football.

3 "Garry Parker is a great player because blah, blah, blah. He must be injured
since he's not playing for Aston Villa." *ONE* day later, the BBC says he's been
put on the transfer list since he "doesn't fit in Aston Villa's plans".

However, for a sizable fee, I will instead predict an Australian upset....

As ever, I am

Stig  :-)

 
 
 

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by Andrew Loban » Thu, 18 Nov 1993 12:18:45


Quote:
>10.  The world cup would suffer if the greatest team did not show up.

....

Quote:
>And...
>1.   God has come back to our team,...

        and his hands are longer than usually.

No offense, though. Just can't help but hit the ball after such a pass!
I believe, Argentina does qualify.

Andrew.

 
 
 

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by homo cybernetic » Thu, 18 Nov 1993 05:12:31

|>
|> 1.   God has come back to our team.
|>

I second that!!

-Un colombiano, pero un aficionado del futbol!

-Let's Go South America!

--
Francis X. Giraldo
Department of Aerospace Engineering
University of ***ia
Phone (804) 977-6452

 
 
 

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by Jason Bola » Sat, 20 Nov 1993 16:02:42

        Surely the top two reasons why Argentina have qualified were:

1. The ground was in a shocking condition.

2. The referee lacked the *** required to send Rugierri off.

 
 
 

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by Ariel Mazzarel » Sat, 20 Nov 1993 18:50:24

Quote:

>    Surely the top two reasons why Argentina have qualified were:
>1. The ground was in a shocking condition.

True enough,  but surely you do not think that harms the hoofing team and helps
the toque team?

An apt analogy would be the assertion that Mozart's music sounds better when
a locomotive drives past the listener.

Quote:
>2. The referee lacked the *** required to send Rugierri off.

Hey,  you're new around here aren't you?  Let me let you in on a little secret.
There is this special rule that allows Ruggeri to make almost any foul he needs
(as long as it is not too ***) and it is not a red card.  Some other
players are also subject to this special rule  (e.g. Ronald Koeman and
Franco Baresi  (coincidentally both of these players have brothers that play
top-level futbol)).  Furthermore,  there were two other defenders waiting
in case Ruggeri did not make the foul--but el Cabezon wanted to make a point,
and he certainly did so.

Nonetheless,  if we had seen a red card there,  then consistency would have
required several red cards for Aussie players.  Sorry I cannot give you any
names,  as aside from Aurelio Vidmar,  "Pearl Jam" Slater,  and the goalie,
I have trouble telling the Aussies apart  (lack of TV exposure I guess).  

Frankly I'm surprised you didn't blame defeat on the offside rule,  for
otherwise Australia would have won 2-1.  I don't know why this rule is not
enforced in Sydney,  but it sure is in Buenos Aires!

Of course you might also observe that the top reason why Argentina did not win
by a score like 4-0 was that some very good shots refused to go in,  at least
three due to great goalie saves and a defender that came back when the net was
empty.  So we got a lucky gol instead.

Don't worry,  I'm sure that you will make the next world cup,  since you will
only have to deal with Asian teams then--and I think your level is
higher than theirs.  

Ariel

 
 
 

Top 10 reasons Argentina will qualify

Post by Pablo Kleinm » Mon, 22 Nov 1993 04:46:25

Quote:

>    Surely the top two reasons why Argentina have qualified were:

>1. The ground was in a shocking condition.

About this -and I'm sure many will be interested in knowing- it was mainly
because it poured all day in Buenos Aires before the match. So besides
Madonna and Michael Jackson, both of whom had concerts at the Monumental
last month, it was due to the heavy rain that the grounds were so bad.

Quote:
>2. The referee lacked the *** required to send Rugierri off.

Oh, c'mon cry baby. We saw who got more (many more) yellow cards this time
around. And besides, Perico Perez is an Argie player, and the ones that made
him rock and roll and bleed were not his teammates...

          -Pablo

--
Pablo Kleinman
Hollywood, CA, USA

FidoNet: 1:10/100
Fax/Data: +1-213-874-7276
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