The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

Post by Johan van Zyl - JVZ Systems » Mon, 13 Sep 1999 04:00:00



Quote:
> The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

> 1.) Now there was a tumult in the land of the Bokke, for many are called,
> yet few are chosen. Yea though many warriors of the Bokke wanted to slay
> their enemies at the Cup Of The World, firstly they must be chosen. And so
> mighty Nick the Mallet and wise Solomons did sit and they did ponder long
> and hard.

> 2) And wise Solomons did say unto Nick the Mallet, "Yea we are sorely
> pressed by the Dallagites and the tribe of Kefu, and the men of Taine will
> grind us. But behold I have a vision! Let us travel to the land of
> Provincialis, and there we will find a fighter called Anton the Obscure.
And
> The Skinsite and Ras of Erasmus who neither know what they do in battle at
> the place of the eight men, we shall confuse and trick our opponents. And
by
> this cunning they shall be amused and shall fall about laughing and not be
> able to fight us from their mirth. And Nick the Mallet saith:  " As long
as
> this Anton whom I know not be from Provincialis, then I agree with you, oh
> wise one."

> 3) And there was weeping and gnashing of teeth in the land of the Bokke,
for
> the champion of the people was one Gary the Teichmanite. And he was bold
and
> a man of dignity and honour. But Nick the Mallet did smite him with
insults
> and calleth unto
> Gary the Teichmanite: " Thou are clapped-out and not even counted among
the
> men of eight in Bokkeland. Thou are finished and unwanted and a burden
unto
> me. Because of you I was smote by the Ozzities and the Zealanders. It be
all
> your fault. I banish you to the land of the Welsh-ites." And wise Solomons
> did agree, for he loved Anton the Obscure as he was from Provincialis.

> 4) And now wise Solomons turned to Nick the Mallet and said: " But for the
> centre of our army, we are sorely lacking. For Japie of Mulder is injured
> and slow, and Andre the Cutter is laid lown and as for Hennie the Red, I
> know you do not love him.. And besides the faction of the Ayencee-ites are
> sorely against us. What shall we do?" And Nick the Mallet said unto
> Solomons:  " Behold there is a man from Ethiopia and he is black and
comely.
> And I shall choose him and place him among our army. And the faction of
the
> Ayencee-ites will be pleased and happy, and shall bless us. And his name
is
> Kaya the Motley-one. It be true he has never fought before any army of
> Ozzities or Pommities or even Ital-ities. But I promise you this, he shall
> take a mighty load off my back."

> 5) But the people of Bokkeland rose in a mighty shout and asketh of their
> generals: "Where are our mighty and wise warriors like Andre the
> Jubilant,William of Chester and others who have fought against all our
> enemies and have slewn them and are wise in the ways of the Cup of the
> World?"

> 6) And then the generals answered the people thus: " Oh ye foolish
> population! You may weep and gnash your teeth and even sprinkle upon
> yourselves the loose grass of the field of Newlands in mourning. But I say
> unto you the Cup of the World giveth us a chance to experiment for the
next
> Cup of the World that shall be held 4 years from now, against the same
> enemies. For this reason I have chosen Pieter the Clumsy and Breyton the
> Small and Deon the Unsure. For my contract runneth over until the year
> 2002."

> 7) And for 4 years the people of the Land of the Bokke wore sack cloth and
> ashes. Beating their chests in misery, crying out at the foolishness of
the
> Generals ,who by now had been banished to the Land of Bigbucs. And thus
> spoke Nick the Mallet, "The Cup of the World, is not the end of the world"
> and thus spoke the wise Solomons, "I knew not of the strange world of
> back-line play, and technical patterns" And the people cried out in fury
> "Indeed, then why did ye banish Jake the White One?" and the Generals and
> the Wise Ones were quiet, feeling foolish, they looked down on the people
> from the lofty heights of Bigbucs, safe in the knowledge that they were
> untouchable.

> --
> Cheers

greetings from Johan van Zyl
Somerset West
South Africa

Clarion 5ee, FM2
Customised Software
 
 
 

The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

Post by Hank & Shelagh van de We » Mon, 13 Sep 1999 04:00:00

Well done Johan - very good indeed - thou art verily funny !

Hank


Quote:


> > The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

> > 1.) Now there was a tumult in the land of the Bokke, for many are called,
> > yet few are chosen. Yea though many warriors of the Bokke wanted to slay
> > their enemies at the Cup Of The World, firstly they must be chosen. And so
> > mighty Nick the Mallet and wise Solomons did sit and they did ponder long
> > and hard.

> > 2) And wise Solomons did say unto Nick the Mallet, "Yea we are sorely
> > pressed by the Dallagites and the tribe of Kefu, and the men of Taine will
> > grind us. But behold I have a vision! Let us travel to the land of
> > Provincialis, and there we will find a fighter called Anton the Obscure.
> And
> > The Skinsite and Ras of Erasmus who neither know what they do in battle at
> > the place of the eight men, we shall confuse and trick our opponents. And
> by
> > this cunning they shall be amused and shall fall about laughing and not be
> > able to fight us from their mirth. And Nick the Mallet saith:  " As long
> as
> > this Anton whom I know not be from Provincialis, then I agree with you, oh
> > wise one."

> > 3) And there was weeping and gnashing of teeth in the land of the Bokke,
> for
> > the champion of the people was one Gary the Teichmanite. And he was bold
> and
> > a man of dignity and honour. But Nick the Mallet did smite him with
> insults
> > and calleth unto
> > Gary the Teichmanite: " Thou are clapped-out and not even counted among
> the
> > men of eight in Bokkeland. Thou are finished and unwanted and a burden
> unto
> > me. Because of you I was smote by the Ozzities and the Zealanders. It be
> all
> > your fault. I banish you to the land of the Welsh-ites." And wise Solomons
> > did agree, for he loved Anton the Obscure as he was from Provincialis.

> > 4) And now wise Solomons turned to Nick the Mallet and said: " But for the
> > centre of our army, we are sorely lacking. For Japie of Mulder is injured
> > and slow, and Andre the Cutter is laid lown and as for Hennie the Red, I
> > know you do not love him.. And besides the faction of the Ayencee-ites are
> > sorely against us. What shall we do?" And Nick the Mallet said unto
> > Solomons:  " Behold there is a man from Ethiopia and he is black and
> comely.
> > And I shall choose him and place him among our army. And the faction of
> the
> > Ayencee-ites will be pleased and happy, and shall bless us. And his name
> is
> > Kaya the Motley-one. It be true he has never fought before any army of
> > Ozzities or Pommities or even Ital-ities. But I promise you this, he shall
> > take a mighty load off my back."

> > 5) But the people of Bokkeland rose in a mighty shout and asketh of their
> > generals: "Where are our mighty and wise warriors like Andre the
> > Jubilant,William of Chester and others who have fought against all our
> > enemies and have slewn them and are wise in the ways of the Cup of the
> > World?"

> > 6) And then the generals answered the people thus: " Oh ye foolish
> > population! You may weep and gnash your teeth and even sprinkle upon
> > yourselves the loose grass of the field of Newlands in mourning. But I say
> > unto you the Cup of the World giveth us a chance to experiment for the
> next
> > Cup of the World that shall be held 4 years from now, against the same
> > enemies. For this reason I have chosen Pieter the Clumsy and Breyton the
> > Small and Deon the Unsure. For my contract runneth over until the year
> > 2002."

> > 7) And for 4 years the people of the Land of the Bokke wore sack cloth and
> > ashes. Beating their chests in misery, crying out at the foolishness of
> the
> > Generals ,who by now had been banished to the Land of Bigbucs. And thus
> > spoke Nick the Mallet, "The Cup of the World, is not the end of the world"
> > and thus spoke the wise Solomons, "I knew not of the strange world of
> > back-line play, and technical patterns" And the people cried out in fury
> > "Indeed, then why did ye banish Jake the White One?" and the Generals and
> > the Wise Ones were quiet, feeling foolish, they looked down on the people
> > from the lofty heights of Bigbucs, safe in the knowledge that they were
> > untouchable.

> > --
> > Cheers

> greetings from Johan van Zyl
> Somerset West
> South Africa

> Clarion 5ee, FM2
> Customised Software


 
 
 

The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

Post by Julian Con » Tue, 14 Sep 1999 04:00:00

Niggler's "Books of Bokke" are indeed classic, and you can find the original
versions of all four chapters (and any future chapters too!) on RugbyHeads
(http://jump.to/rugbyheads).

Come an check them out, along with all the other great RugbyHeads content.

Cheers, Jules...
on behalf of Rugbyheads

http://jump.to/rugbyheads - Passionately one-eyed and proud of it!

 
 
 

The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

Post by rick boy » Tue, 14 Sep 1999 04:00:00


Quote:



> > The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

> > 1.) Now there was a tumult in the land of the Bokke, for many are called,
> > yet few are chosen.

Turneth then Boyd the Heretic unto his concubine, and sayeth he unto
her, "Woman, passeth to me yon bucket that I might empty into it the
contents of mine stomach." "Sirrah," she replieth unto him, "Wherefore
shouldst thou doest this thing?" "Verily," quoth he, "The rancid camel's
manure that I readeth upon my Digital Scroll is passing foul and it
stinketh unto the heavens. It is rumoured that in the land of the
Springing Bok that the Sons of Japie regardeth this steaming hyena vomit
as the very stuff of jests and japes, but it doth appear to me to be
nought but a leper's ***discharge."

-- Rick Boyd

Perth-Bayswater Rugby Union Football Club, Western Australia
club homepage: http://SportToday.org/~boyd/perth-baysw.htm

 
 
 

The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

Post by lpo » Wed, 15 Sep 1999 04:00:00

Sons of Japie regardeth this steaming hyena vomit

Quote:
> as the very stuff of jests and japes, but it doth appear to me to be
> nought but a leper's ***discharge."

Don't ever try to become a comedian or humorist.
 
 
 

The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

Post by Arok » Thu, 16 Sep 1999 04:00:00


Quote:


> Sons of Japie regardeth this steaming hyena vomit
> > as the very stuff of jests and japes, but it doth appear to me to be
> > nought but a leper's ***discharge."

> Don't ever try to become a comedian or humorist.

        and would this be speaking from experience?
 
 
 

The Book of The Bokke, Chapter 10 Verses 1-10

Post by lpo » Thu, 16 Sep 1999 04:00:00


Quote:


> > Don't ever try to become a comedian or humorist.

>         and would this be speaking from experience?

You obviously found that funny.Stick to the original Book of the Bokke.It is
funny.Not tthat crude drivel.